A Battle Beneath It All

My bony fingers with nails of myriad colours began trembling as my small palm sweat. My breathing grew heavier, as though I have been on the treadmill for hours. My beady eyes dart wildly around the brightly painted red and yellow fast food outlet before finally resting on the chairs of an ebony shade. Amidst the bustling of orders being taken and the chatters of friends and families, my loud inhaling and exhaling was still evidently heard. “Um, Bliss Hekate? Where are you schooling now?” That same question rang in my ears as this unknown lanky silhouette towered over me.

Bliss Hekate? School? Who was he talking to? Who was he anyway? I doubt I have seen him in my whole entire life.

The well-built figure stood tall and strong in contrast to my tiny, fragile frame that shook even under three layers of clothing. His smooth thin lips kept moving, mouthing words I could not hear. Not only that, I could not even hear the hustle and bustle anymore. There was solely silence.

Was I deaf?

His tanned, beefed-up arms with veins trying their luck at tearing his skin open reached for my narrow shoulders. He jerked me, my ragdoll body swaying. The peace and serenity ascended into a whirlpool of clamor and noise. My whole world began spinning as if I were a ballerina doing pirouettes in a ballroom. My mouth hung open as I battled for air while my chest consistently puffed up before sinking in back each time.

“Bliss? Earth to Miss Hekate. Hello?” the familiar, masculine yet melodious voice lingered around my earlobe as intense dark brown eyes stared into mine- jet black iris disguising the chaos behind it with simple blankness. It took me awhile before features of the face came into focus like those of a camera’s lens. He is Ben. Ben something.

“Sorry. I was um…dizzy.” My eyes immediately scurried down to the pale tiled flooring while my cheeks grew a ruby shade of blood. A sudden icy cold touch landed on my chopstick arms and I was positive I felt an electric shock pass through my bones, making me jolt back. In a flash, the dashing young man with soft, fluffy hair raised his bulky arms up similar to those done when surrendering. All he needed was a white piece of cloth.

Ben, I think that was his name, cautiously lowered his confused, fiery gaze into my bewildered eyes while motioning for the seats by his side. Did he think I was crazy? My crimson cheeks burned with embarrassment while I tried to bury it under my long locks but to no avail. “Hey, there is nothing to be shy about.” A voice so convincing that it successfully puts me back to a calm state of mind. I heaved a sigh of relief.

“Let’s start over. How has life been after middle school?” His tone so gentle and inviting, luring me in. I rattled on about my high school adventures, from trying to fit in with the crowd to the mind blowing, hectic schedule. I was lost in the conversation. My hands flew crazy in the air, telling a story of their own. “And you won’t believe what happened during the football game.” I babbled on about the behind-the-bleachers’ usual incidents that should be kept on hush mode or I would probably be hunted down by the victims themselves. I looked into Ben’s seductive eyes and saw a lively, animated reflection of myself. Such joy. Such happiness. Such bliss.

The warm, fuzzy feeling I felt inside painted a wide smile on my oval face while I watched on as he evoked my imagination with tales of his own. I was immersed into his everyday life of school and part time job as a cashier. I pictured him as a suave cashier with a crisply, ironed green apron on, looking no less majestic than Prince Charming. My left palm cupped my chin as I tilted my head to the side, as though my visualisation of him as a prince would be clearer. Sparks flickered around him as my dark, emotionless eyes gawked at nothing in particular.

Wait, is this man talking to me? Who was he anyway?

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What went behind A Battle Beneath It All:

A Battle Beneath It All is a flash fiction told from Bliss Hekate’s perspective as someone who suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder. This condition is also known as Multiple Personality Disorder whereby individuals possess two or more identities. They tend to forget things such as personal history, people and even places. In addition to that, they may face visual or auditory hallucinations.

In this flash fiction, one of the signs of Bliss’s condition is her name itself. Bliss simply means joy and happiness whereas Hekate is a goddess in Greek mythology associated with crossroads and witchcraft. This distinct difference reemphasises the dual identities she has.

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